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Woz-not-Woz: Apple cofounder Steve Wozniak went on CBS to warn about fake videos of him promoting Bitcoin. The scam clips promise to double whatever BTC you send. The funny part? While telling the story, CBS showed a fake 1970s “Woz in his garage” photo, which turned out to be of a Disney animatronic. Awkward.

The average turbulence score on America’s bumpiest flight. The eddy dissipation rate (EDR) is basically a nerdy way to measure how violently the air’s shaking you around. Albuquerque to Denver nails it, turning a short hop over the Rockies into a midair mechanical bull ride. Expect seat belt signs, coffee spills and a nervous chuckle from the flight attendant.

🦶🏻 Off on the wrong foot: A viral TikTok told her selling feet pics was “easy money.” In reality? She paid a $5 platform fee, submitted ID, built a brand and made $0, which somehow feels worse than being a SoundCloud rapper. She didn’t hit “rock bottom,” but she did step on it.

Swift thinking: Taylor Swift revealed her twelfth album, The Life of a Showgirl, not on stage but on boyfriend Travis Kelce’s podcast, precisely at 12:12 ET on Aug. 12. No songs, no date, just a master class in soft-launch hype engineering. Within 15 minutes, she had over 1 million views. Dang, how do I get Taylor on my show? 

📸 That’s one bad Lenovo: Researchers at Eclypsium have shown that some Lenovo webcams (510 FHD and Performance FHD) can be reprogrammed via BadUSB‑style firmware attacks to inject keystrokes and drop malware, which can persist even after reinstalls. Translation: Your webcam can now type, hack and haunt your PC forever. Patch via firmware 4.8.0 now.

Big Windows update: Yup, Microsoft rolled out fixes for over 100 security flaws, including critical ones that let hackers remotely run malicious code on your PC. The Black Screen of Death is now official, and a new Quick Machine Recovery feature will try to fix your PC if there’s a boot problem. Go to Settings > Windows Update to get it.

That’s how long the average Character.AI user chats with a bot every day. More time than most people spend talking to their actual friends. But hey, Sherlock Holmes never zones out mid-convo to scroll Instagram, right? Turns out, you can put a price on friendship (paywall link): $10 a month, to be exact.

🧳 Panic in the skies: Midway through a plane ride, Will’s AirTag said his suitcase was “left behind” at the last airport. No Wi-Fi meant two hours of imagining his luggage sipping cocktails without him. Landing? Bag was fine. An AirTag glitch. Therapy bill pending. At least Reddit is free; Will’s post is going viral. 

Data today, gone tomorrow: Back it up before it backs out on you. Total Drive automatically saves your photos, videos and important documents in the cloud, safe and sound. Simple, secure, and yes, I trust it with my own files. Get 10TB for just $18.

That’s how much market value Do Kwon vaporized in his crypto collapse. He hyped TerraUSD as a stablecoin, then secretly used a trading firm to fake its stability. He could face up to 25 years, but the feds will settle for 12. That’s about one year for every $3.3 billion in lost value.