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When you’re everyone’s unpaid emotional support intern
“Hey, Kim, This isn’t tech. I’m the one keeping the peace, at work, at home, with friends. I smooth things over and manage everyone’s moods. It’s exhausting, but if I stop, I’m scared everything unravels. What should I do?” — Megan from Cincinnati
Welcome to the unpaid role of feelings manager, Megan. It comes with built-in burnout, festering resentment and the creeping illusion that if you stop functioning, everything (and everyone) will fall apart. You’re the glue. Except where’s your support?
🤖 Help for the empathy bottleneck
AI can help you stop running your nervous system like a 24/7 conflict resolution hotline and get some space back by automating the hard part, i.e., how to have your say. Here are ideas for you to use with ChatGPT or your favorite chatbot.
Generate de-escalation scripts, responses that untangle defensiveness without defaulting to apology theater.
“Write me a text that acknowledges their frustration but doesn’t end with me groveling.”
“Give me three responses that don’t sound like I’m rolling over.”
Build conversation openers that don’t snowball into 40-minute emotional triage sessions.
“Suggest a way to check in that won’t lead to me fixing their problems.”
“Give me a neutral opener that keeps the conversation light, not loaded.”
Help people feel heard: Summarize their thoughts, so you properly touch base on what they feel.
“Rewrite their long rant into three clear points I can respond to.”
“How do I mirror what they’re saying without making promises I can’t keep?”
🛟 Choosing rest over rescue
AI isn’t a hall pass to shirk personal responsibility, but it does help carry the mental parts of the emotional labor load. Think of it as an infinitely patient rehearsal partner for your least favorite dynamic.
I used ChatGPT to write a text to my son explaining why even though he works for me, it’s important to get to work on time. I forgot we share a paid ChatGPT account. Well, a few minutes after I sent it, my son called. “Mom, I can’t believe you used Chat for that text.” I told him, “Sometimes I come across too hard, so I wanted to make sure that didn’t happen.” It worked.
Have you ever used AI to calm down an emotional situation? Tell me about it here!
💁♀️ Use the icons below to help others use a chatbot in a way they may have never thought of before.
Tags: ChatGPT, friends, home, space, tech
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