Zillow stalking: The new national pastime
Confession time: I Zillow people. All the time.
Someone casually mentions they just bought a house in Aspen? I’m on it. I’m already hunched over my keyboard like a Nancy Drew reboot.
Survive Zoom, thrive IRL
That meeting that could have been an email? You’re on it, eyes glossing over rambling updates, Todd’s screen share failing for the fourth time (use a mouse, Todd) or what appears to be a seance: “If you can hear me now, make a sign.”
Paper coupons exploding: Well, not really. But Kroger got bullied into giving boomers and tech avoidants exactly what they wanted: real physical coupons. Print versions of digital-only deals drop every Wednesday. Just grab a flyer and flash it like it’s 2005. No app logins, no error messages from hell.
$300 million
What Meta reportedly dangled to top AI researchers. Zuck’s new Superintelligence Lab is in full poach mode, trying to lure OpenAI stars with equity-rich packages. First-year compensation? Over $100 million in some cases. OpenAI has already lost seven staffers to Meta. Execs are saying it’s “like someone broke into our home.”
Take a trip back to your childhood home, no plane ticket required
That’s my childhood home above at 111 Washington Avenue, South Amboy, NJ. I was about 10 when I knocked out my front tooth on the swing set. There was also the day when I made the very bad decision to throw a snowball at a passing police car while the officer had his windows open. (Yes, I hit him. No, I don’t recommend it.)
AI-powered home gadgets that lower your bills
Every time my energy bill arrives, I swear it looks more like a ransom note: “$412 or the AC gets it.”
But guess what? Some good (actually smart) tech can help liberate you from this hostage situation, with real savings.
🧬 Hidden sperm, found: Meanwhile, scientists used AI meant for spotting hidden stars to find rogue sperm in infertile men. One woman got pregnant after 19 years of “nothing.” It’s called STAR, and it found three viable swimmers out of millions of images. They didn’t see this coming.
Oops, AI faked our bust: This is bad. Maine cops posted a drug bust photo, then realized it was “substantially” AI-edited. Packaging on the drugs looked like AI gibberish, and people called them out. An officer used an editing app to slap the department’s patch in, and it warped the photo’s details. Officers swore they’re not deepfaking meth. It’s just their app skills are trash.
Apple v. Everyone: This isn’t surprising news, but you should be aware. Apple tried to block a DOJ antitrust suit saying it rigs the smartphone market, and lost. The case will go to trial, with feds claiming Apple bullies devs, locks out competition and basically gatekeeps iOS. Apple says it’s just “innovation.”
⚠️ AI ate the home page: First, the good news. ChatGPT’s referrals to sites are way up (25x!) from zero. The bad news? Nearly 70% of Google searches now end in zero clicks to sites. It just doesn’t matter if you’re top of Google search results anymore. SEO used to be gold. Spoiler: I predicted this over two years ago and got laughed at.