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Duct tape fixes for the digital age

ChatGPT

Tech doesn’t always play nice. Your laptop heats up, your Wi-Fi fizzles, and sometimes you’re just standing there, squinting at your screen, wondering where the mouse pointer disappeared to.

Don’t panic. Just try these fast fixes. Each takes under a minute and requires zero tech degree … although if you pull these off in front of someone else, you may get a slow clap, and maybe even a mozzarella stick.

1. “My internet stinks.”

💡 Try Orb.net. It’s a free, easy-to-use, excellent tool that checks if your device is the issue or if the internet itself is slowing things down. You’ll see exactly how your connection is performing in real time, including local vs. remote speed tests.

💰 Pro tip: You can also use the reports to see if you’re actually getting the connection speed you’re paying for.

2. “Is this battery dead?”

🔋 Try the bounce test. Find a flat, solid surface like a countertop or hardcover book. Hold the AA or AAA battery vertically and drop it from about 8 inches (20 cm).

If it clunks and tumbles? Still got juice. If it bounces like it’s auditioning for Cirque du Soleil? It’s dead.

Weird? Yes. Accurate? Also yes. This quirky trick works because discharged batteries have a different internal structure that makes them springier.

3. “What’s up with the mic?”

🎙️ Use your phone’s voice recorder app. Open your built-in iPhone Voice Memos or Android Voice Recorder app, press record and speak normally. Then play it back.

Sound fine? Mic’s good. Sound like you swallowed gravel? Try cleaning mic holes with a soft toothbrush or compressed air.

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Samsung’s fridge knows your voice: The new smart models recognize who’s talking to personalize the screen. So when you speak, it shows your calendar, photos, applies your favorite color settings and rats you out when you’re sneaking pie in the middle of the night. I made that last part up, but it’s a definite possibility.

Check your privacy settings: Social media apps update often, and sometimes your preferences change without you noticing. Review who can see your posts, who can tag you and what info is public. Most apps have this under Profile (or the three line Menu) > Settings > Privacy.

📺 Your TV, your rules: Some Roku wallpapers double as ads for shows, movies or brands. Don’t want your screen turning into a billboard? Go to Settings > Theme > Sponsored Wallpapers, and switch it to Off. Btw, you could save big on a new Roku Ultra (20% off).

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🔖 Better than bookmarks: Reopening the same tabs every day? Let your browser remember them for you. In Chrome, click the three-dot menu (top right) > Settings > On startup > Continue where you left off. Nice.

Turn off Fire Stick clicks: You know that annoying little sound every time you move through the menu? Leave it on long enough and you’ll start hearing it in your dreams. Go to Settings > Display & Sounds > Audio > Navigation Sounds and switch it Off. Congrats, your sanity just thanked you.

🍸 Venmoed $40 for cocktails? Everyone on Venmo can see that unless you tweak your settings. To lock it down, go to Settings > Privacy and switch it to Private. That way, only you and the person you’re paying can see it.

Not now, Microsoft: Don’t let a surprise Windows update crash your workflow. Go to Start > Settings > Windows Update. Then, choose how long you want to pause it. Think carefully, because once that time’s up, it’ll install before letting you pause again.

Alexa, turn it up: Fine-tune your Echo’s sound for higher (treble) or lower (bass) frequencies. Just say “Alexa, reset the equalizer,” or “Alexa, turn up the treble.” Or open the Alexa app and go to Devices (lightbulb icon) > [your Echo] > Device Settings (gear icon) > Audio Controls, then use the sliders to adjust.

🔴 Go live, privately: Instagram lets you livestream just to your close friends instead of all your followers. Tap the + button, choose Live, then select Share with Close Friends and start broadcasting. You can add up to three pals. Want to tweak your list? Head to More (three lines) > Settings > Who can see your content > Close Friends.

Record your screen: OBS Studio is a free app that works on Windows and Mac. It’s easy to use: Just go to Add Source > Display Capture, choose Automatic as your Capture Method and hit OK. Now click Start Recording, and Stop Recording when you’re done. Pro tip: Use this guide for the best video settings.

Facebook on mute: Whether you’re sneaking a scroll at work or just want things silenced, it’s easy to stop videos from auto-playing with sound. On your phone, go to Menu > Settings & privacy > Settings > Media and toggle Videos Start with Sound off. Ah, much better.

Ads begone: Windows 11 sneakily puts ads in your Start menu, but you disable ’em. Go to Start > Settings > Personalization. Hit Start and toggle Show recommendations for tips, shortcuts, new apps, and more off.

🙈 No peeking: Disabling message previews keeps prying off your texts. On iPhone, go to Settings > Notifications > Messages. For Android, it’s Settings > Notifications > App Notifications > Messages > Lock screen. Now that “urgent code” from your bank won’t show up while your phone’s unattended at a café.

📺 Watching YouTube at night? Turn on dark mode for some eye comfort. On Desktop, click your profile picture (top right), scroll to Appearance and select Dark theme. On the mobile app, go to Settings > General > Appearance, then tap Dark theme.

🧠 ChatGPT update: OpenAI finally rolled out a memory feature for the free version. Now the chatbot can remember things you’ve told it and tailor replies to match. Say you’re dairy-free? Expect vegan recipes. Heads up though: It’s a light version, so only recent convos stick. You can turn it off under Settings > Personalization > Memory.

Disable Microsoft ads: Windows loves promoting its own services. To turn it off, go to Settings > Privacy & Security > Windows permissions > General, and toggle off all five options. Then go to Settings > System > Notifications > Additional settings, and untick Get tips and suggestions when using Windows.

🎧 Spotify sounding flat? On mobile, it might default to lower audio quality to save data. On iOS, go to Settings and privacy > Audio Quality and set it to High. On Android, go to Settings and privacy > Media Quality and set it to High. If you have Premium, there’s also a Very High option. One great option that always sounds great is my show, IMHO.

👆 Search your PC in seconds: Press Windows key + S and start typing. You can pull up apps, files, system settings and web results in seconds. No more clicking around or digging through menus.