📡 Siri’s not OK: Maybe you’re like me getting so frustrated at it because it just sucks. Apple’s AI fix is … other people’s AI. Siri flopped so hard, Apple’s sending us off to ChatGPT (and maybe Gemini and Perplexity, too) to avoid embarrassment. A shiny new, non-humiliating Siri is in the works, but don’t hold your breath. It’s not even invited to Apple’s developers conference in June.
Tags: Apple, ChatGPT, developers, fix, users
Think you’re off the grid? Think again. Your phone is basically a chatty little informant. While you were living your life, grabbing coffee, sneaking off for that totally relaxing solo cabin trip, it was logging every move like a nosy aunt with a snooping addiction.
That’s how many NFL stars could make up Team USA’s Olympic flag football roster in 2028. The NFL just gave its blessing for players to suit up for the red, white and blue. Get ready for Patrick Mahomes, Lamar Jackson and Tyreek Hill to turn the Games into a glorified Pro Bowl.
That’s how long it took people to stop Googling “Twitter login.” Elon Musk did a switcheroo with Twitter’s name and replaced it with “X.” Google searches for “X login” have finally pulled ahead. So yes, brand recognition does come … eventually. Just don’t expect some to stop calling it “Tweeter.”
How fast Nvidia-grade AI hardware can crack your 8-character password. Hive Systems ran the numbers, and yeah, it’s bleak for your bare-minimum login. It can also crack a numbers-only string in about three hours. Pro tip: Save yourself some peace of mind by using the same password manager I do.
That’s the share of parents who use DoorDash. More than half of families with kids are ordering delivery at least once a week. Because between soccer practice and homework meltdowns, no one’s got time to sauté. Basically, Uber Eats is the new family dinner.
How long you’ll sit in prison for faking an ID and hijacking the SEC’s Twitter. Eric Council Jr. SIM swapped his way into the SEC’s X account with a bogus ID, dropped a fake Bitcoin ETF approval tweet and briefly spiked and tanked the Bitcoin price. The feds didn’t LOL. Now he’s got over a year to think about it.
That’s how many satellites China wants in its new orbiting AI supercomputer. It’s called the “Three-Body Computing Constellation,” and they’ve already launched 12. Each satellite runs its own 8 billion parameter AI model and talks to the others at up to 100 Gbps (with lasers, obviously). The goal is basically turning space into one giant neural net.
That’s how long a Lufthansa flight cruised without a pilot. The copilot passed out mid-flight while flying solo, because the captain was on a bathroom break. Autopilot kept things chill, but it took five unanswered chimes, an emergency code and some serious heart rate spikes before the captain could break back in and take over.
The increased risk of hemorrhoids if you scroll on your phone while on the toilet. A new survey found that prolonged scrolling sessions on the porcelain throne might be more dangerous than you think. Maybe it’s time to swap the TikTok binge for, I don’t know, getting off the toilet. What’s it called when you get a hemorrhoid in space? An assteroid. (That was a good one!)
