I hope you’re ready for Zuck’s “Get Low” cover. Heads-up: The lyrics are pretty explicit. In case you love it, they also dropped it on Spotify under the artist name “Z-Pain.” Does anyone have a Tylenol? I need a Z-Painkiller after listening to that.
Should you tape over your webcam?
A photo of Mark Zuckerberg shows tape over his laptop camera and mic. There’s a good reason you might want to do the same.
The $100M cold email: Mark Zuckerberg is personally sliding into researchers’ DMs (like key OpenAI personnel) with $100 million job offers (paywall link). He’s hosting dinners, reading white papers and, yes, planning people’s desk locations himself. It’s like a Black Mirror reboot of Undercover Boss, except the boss is a billionaire trying to build Skynet.
$330 Million
What Mark Zuckerberg spent on two yachts just to go skiing. He shipped his 387-foot mega-yacht and its $30M helipad buddy 5,300 miles just to shred some fjords in Norway without technically violating local laws that ban choppers from landing on actual land.
The have’s and the have yachts
Billionaire Mark Zuckerberg, sporting a gold chain and Gen Z curly hair, knows everyone’s roasting him online. From being called a lizard to claims he doesn’t blink, he’s ok with it. At 40, he says from his 387-foot mega yacht, if you’re gonna joke, “At least make them good memes.”
👎 Social media is over: That’s what Mark Zuckerberg says. Meta’s being sued by the government for acting like a monopoly, but Zuck says every app does the same thing. TikTok and YouTube are just news, celebrity promos and AI slop now, like Meta. So really, what hold do they have? The days of friends posting real updates are long gone (paywall link).
🧑⚖️ Zuck tried to settle with mucho bucks: Mark Zuckerberg thought he could pay his way out of a government antitrust trial over Meta’s acquisitions of Instagram and WhatsApp. The FTC wanted $30B; Zuckerberg offered $450M and good vibes. The FTC said: lol, no. Meta argues that TikTok is the real threat now, not Instagram.
🏛️ Meta, meet another existential court case: Mark Zuckerberg put on his best courtroom tie and took the stand Monday in a trial that could break up Meta’s empire. The FTC basically wants (paywall link) Meta to sell off Instagram and WhatsApp, claiming Meta bought them just to squash the competition. If IG goes, it could gut over half of Meta’s U.S. ad revenue. The trial runs through July, but the vibes are already tense.
3,028
How many people made Forbes’ 2025 Billionaires List. Leading the pack? Elon Musk at $342B, Mark Zuckerberg at $216B and Jeff Bezos at $215B. Altogether, the list is worth a ridiculous $16.1 trillion! For perspective, they could literally give every person on Earth $2,000, but they won’t.
👔 From hoodies to high-end: Remember when tech CEOs’ unofficial uniforms were T-shirts and dorky sneakers? Now, Mark Zuckerberg rocks a $895,000 watch and Jeff Bezos is at fashion shows in leather and sunglasses. It’s not just that they grew up; tech drives our economy, and the billionaires in charge aren’t hiding their wealth anymore. In 1999, when Bezos was already a billionaire, he was driving a 1997 Honda Accord. Those days are long gone!
🌍 Why Greenland? It all comes back to the AI race. The country is rich in precious metals. KoBold Metals is one startup digging up raw materials there to fuel AI production. Jeff Bezos, Sam Altman and Mark Zuckerberg are all investors. Gotta secure those resources to keep scaling up AI data centers. Follow the money, folks. I really want to go to Greenland.
Bet he’s a peach to be around right now: Mark Zuckerberg’s got four “war rooms” going at Meta HQ to figure out DeepSeek’s secrets. Two teams are focused on training and operating costs; the other two are digging into how the data might level up Meta’s next Llama model. Think about this: All the U.S.-based AI companies just got a kick in the butt to do better.
Jobs at stake: In the coming weeks, OpenAI is expected to announce Ph.D.-level bots capable of handling complex human tasks. This is what Mark Zuckerberg mentioned recently on Joe Rogan’s podcast. AI upgrades this year could replace mid-level software engineers and write their own code. We’re moving far beyond single command prompts, folks. Good thing you’re here so you’re in the know.
🛩️ When you’re the boss, you make the rules: You can post almost anything on social media — as long as it doesn’t tick off the billionaire owners. Take Facebook: Election misinformation, fake news and AI junk? Totally fine. But use public data to track Mark Zuckerberg’s $66.5 million Gulfstream G650ER jet with the tail number N68885, and your account will be suspended.
🥽 The “future of human connection”: That’s what Mark Zuckerberg will talk about at the big Meta conference this Wednesday and Thursday. Expect updates for Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp, along with some AI goodies, a more affordable Meta Quest headset and maybe augmented-reality glasses. You heard it here first, folks.
It's official: Facebook censors your opinions
Mark Zuckerberg is now apologizing for censoring conservative views during the pandemic. But the real shocker? He claims it was under pressure from the White House.
Where there’s smoke: Mark Zuckerberg has three weeks to tell Congress why drug dealers are allowed to advertise on Facebook and Instagram. We’re talking ads featuring piles of pills, weed and bricks of cocaine, all directing you to chat apps and drug dealers. Wonder how he’ll spin this one.
The boy who would be king
What’s stopping Mark Zuckerberg from ruling the land? Find out the answer in this podcast. Also, Nancy from South Carolina is looking for a cure for battery drain, and I’ve got some tips.
June 24th, 2023
In this week’s show, creeps are using Discord servers to exploit children. I talk to AARP ambassador Kate Kleinert about the scam that changed her life — here’s how she’s flipping the script on fraudsters. Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg’s cage fight, Finnish
Mark Zuckerberg announces a new VR headset but nobody cares
The Metaverse is dead. Are Meta’s line of VR headsets dead too? I have the scoop in this 60-second podcast.