Only 9% of people keep their resolutions

New internet speed world record. That’s 4.5 million times faster than the average broadband connection. Some context: At that speed, it’d take one minute to download every single movie listed on IMDb. Speaking of … How do you know the speed of light is much faster than the speed of sound? Because some people appear bright until they open their mouths.

Cue the “Jeopardy!” music: This company added a 27-inch LCD screen to its new microwave to bombard you with ads. The answer: Who is LG? Nothing’s sacred. They’re following Samsung’s lead by putting screens on everything as a way to make extra cash. I’ll keep my “dumb” microwave.

Age of footprints found in Saudi Arabia. These are the oldest ones ever uncovered on the Arabian Peninsula. They turned up in a dried-up watering hole in the Nafud Desert, right next to animal tracks. The area was wetter back then, and early humans were likely taking a water break alongside other animals, like a prehistoric rest stop.

Can AI save Facebook? Meta hopes so. They’re rolling out AI avatars (paywall link) to pull in younger people. Robo-influencers are all the rage. Snapchat and TikTok are jumping on the bandwagon, too. It sounds strange, but I’ve read some of these AI-based virtual influencers make $10,000 per post. Maybe I’m in the wrong business.

🛜 Thanks for your service: Looks like Google secretly used phones for an interesting project. Researchers turned millions of Androids into tiny stations to map the ionosphere — 37 to 190 miles up, where space particles mess with GPS systems, leaving gaps in places like South America and Africa. It’s good the service is getting better for folks who live there, but isn’t it creepy Google can just flip a switch like that?

39,000 more vehicles recalled: The latest round includes Volvo C40 electric crossovers, Mercedes-Benz E 350 and 450 models, Ram 1500s, and the Ford F-150 Lightning. Instead of wading through lists, download the free SaferCar app that alerts you to recalls as they happen.

🇨🇳 Communist China hacked the U.S. Treasury: They stole a key from a third-party cybersecurity firm called BeyondTrust (ironic name) on Dec. 8 to take a good, long look and steal a ton of unclassified docs. The U.S. Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Security Agency and FBI are still sussing out how bad the breach was. China denies everything, of course.

Collected by holiday apps compared to regular paid apps. The holidays are over, but those festive apps are still gifting your data to anyone willing to pay. Monopoly Go! is the worst offender. Here’s the full list. Ditch ‘em.