The weirdest things you didn’t know you can buy on Amazon
Amazon is the world’s largest online shopping center. You can find basically anything you can imagine there — and we mean anything. For every essential item you find that you’d actually want in your home, you can also find something incredibly strange.
Given Amazon’s size and scope (not to mention reach in the world), it makes sense that a chunk of its inventory is completely bizarre. Do people actually use these items, though? We can’t be sure, but if nothing else, we’re at least amused by many of the options we found last time we went online shopping.
We decided to create a list of our favorite weird Amazon products — and we’ll challenge you to decide if anyone would actually want these. Some of them do seem to have a purpose, while others…aren’t so clear. Check out the list below and see if there’s anything you want from Amazon’s kookiest corners, or if you’re just as baffled by these products as we are!
Garden Genie Gloves with Claws
If you like the super villains Sabretooth and Catwoman, but also have a penchant for gardening, the Garden Genie Gloves with Claws may be the perfect product for you. The claws on the ends are designed to let you dig into dirt without gardening tools.
Because we all know how annoying shovels and spades can be, we’d rather use these gloves that let us move a couple of handfuls of dirt at a time!
Honestly, though, these gloves could be a fun way to get kids into gardening, but sadly, they only come in adult sizes. At least the gloves come in different colors — if you want that option. Not our first choice for those with green thumbs, but maybe you feel differently.
Nicolas Cage Face Mermaid Sequin Throw Pillowcase
Okay, the reversible sequin pillows can actually be really fun to play with — and they’re especially great for kids. Does any kid love Nick Cage enough to want his face on a pillow, though? Or any adult, for that matter?
Certainly if you want an elaborate ice-breaker for your living room, you could do much worse than this rather interesting pillow. But being able to make eye contact with the Cage part of the pillow, morning, noon or night, is a bit much for us.
The Ghost Meter EMF Sensor
There are so many people who talk about experiences with spirits and hauntings that a belief in ghosts is no longer that unreasonable or crazy. Perhaps the dead do walk among us in some form, and perhaps some of us are able to interact with them.
Will a $35 hunk of plastic with flashing lights and the words “The Ghost Meter” printed on it help you learn if a ghost is nearby? We have our doubts.
Crafting with Cat Hair
It is an unavoidable fact that when you own a cat, absolutely everything you own becomes covered with cat hair.
The amount of fur you will find will far exceed the size of your cat, so wanting to find a use for it is understandable — even pragmatic, to a degree. But crafting with cat hair…well, perhaps if this book appeals to you, or to a friend of yours, you may find this action figure (also available on Amazon) to be a small, three-dimensional self-portrait.
Gift of Nothing
Truthfully, the Gift of Nothing could be a fun gag gift, particularly for someone who said they wanted “nothing” for a birthday or holiday this year. But you could probably make something that makes the same joke, and it won’t cost you $10 plus shipping (unless you have Prime).
Also, a lot of the reviews on this product say the images don’t match up to what you receive in the mail. It just doesn’t seem worth it to us, but it’s guaranteed to get a laugh if you do decide to buy it, so it’s really up to you.
SereneLife Portable Infrared Home Spa
Look at the title of this list — we said this was a list of weird Amazon products, not useless ones. And these portable home spas are well-regarded, particularly for people with chronic pain.
The SereneLife Portable Infrared Home Spa is very well-reviewed. If you’re thinking about getting something like this, or would like to look into it, just note people do look weird when they use it. Just look at the picture they use to advertise this product — even with great lighting and Photoshop, there’s no way NOT to look like a strange beanbag person.
Please, enjoy this product if you have it! We’re very in favor of anything that makes people more comfortable and relaxed on a day-to-day basis. We just also can’t help but find the entire concept and appearance a bit bizarre.
Forgive us for this judgment — we long for your self-confidence and certainty in owning something like a personal spa. You are the better people. We just can’t get over having your hands out like that for basically no reason (there’s no way you can really use them when sealed in there!).
Archie McPhee Handi Squirrel
Well, some weird products are actually pretty useless too. Unless you want to…what? Taunt your squirrel-obsessed dog? Terrify the baby or toddler in your life? Be part of a strange and haunting puppet show no one could possible enjoy?
We’re not sure what the worst part is here — the collective squirrel parts named “Archie McPhee,” who doesn’t really have a tail (the most iconic part of a squirrel…maybe it’s supposed to be your arm? But the effect just doesn’t come together with a fleshy forearm), or that the collective squirrel parts have a NAME.
At least you can address Archie formally when you tell him and his black pits for eyes to “go away forever, please.” Can you tell this product is one of our least favorite things? We’re genuinely sad it even exists.
Puff-N-Fluff Dog Dryer
Dogs are the absolute best, and bathing them can be the absolute worst — particularly if you have a dog with longer hair that takes a long time to dry.
Enter the Puff-N-Fluff Dog Dryer, an “As Seen on TV” product you can purchase on Amazon whenever your heart desires. Whether your heart desires a product that may not quite work with its intended purpose, as reviews on the Amazon page are saying, is up to you.
You will certainly get a good giggle looking at your pooch in that puffed-up suit. And the Puff-N-Fluff comes in a variety of sizes, so the giggle fest can happen no matter what size dog you have. And isn’t a funny product that doesn’t do its job just as good as a product that DOES work? Okay, fine. Probably not, but at least the pictures and videos of this thing are amazing.
Allwood Eagle Vista Cabin Kit
You probably know you can buy a lot of things FOR your home on Amazon, but did you know you can also buy AN ENTIRE HOME?!
The Allwood Eagle Vista Cabin Kit is one of SEVERAL cabin models sold by Allwood, which all give you different insulation options and even foundation options for your property. So on top of giving you money for buying a home, Amazon can be the place where you buy the physical house itself.
We know Amazon is a convenient place to shop, but being able to buy a 1,400-square-foot home really puts it in a whole other category. At least the cabin’s cost seems equivalent to what it is. The kicker? It also has MULTIPLE FLOORS and you BUILD IT YOURSELF! Why is this something you can buy on the internet?! What world do we live in that this is an option?
The Beach Behemoth Giant Inflatable 12-Foot Beach Ball
Beach balls are definitely a fun thing to have at the beach, and they’re usually 11-to-24-inches in diameter, so getting a beach ball that is 12 feet in diameter should therefore give you 6-to-12 times more fun when you’re at the beach! Right?
Ignore reviews and YouTube videos of these giant beach balls becoming dangerous, unstoppable beasts when the wind picks up. Just enjoy the novelty of it and make human bowling the main activity on your next beach outing.
Wallmonkeys Senior Woman with Asthma Wall Decal
There are many unusual wall decals available on Amazon, and this senior woman using her inhaler is pretty par for the course with what they depict.
Mostly likely, these decals are meant to be used in pharmacies or drug stores, advertising products or giving people an idea of what sorts of things they can purchase there; however, we can’t stop imagining someone putting this decal up in their living room. Or their bedroom. Or their bathroom.
It’s not entirely our fault, the product image puts the decal above a bed, like that’s something someone would really actually do in…their real homes…in real life.
Still, we should be more practical than this. We just aren’t. Much like this wall decal, we are completely silly and we get way too big a kick from people posting pictures using the decal in the reviews. But that’s the fun of these Amazon products; you get a good chuckle and creative exercise out of figuring out how, or if, people actually use these things.
We hope you enjoyed the list as much as we enjoyed putting it together. It’s always fun to be reminded that the internet, even in places where you shop very practically, has a great sense of humor. It’s also fun to be reminded of the great things you can get on Amazon, from useful items to, well, items like these. Whichever you choose to buy, have fun!
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