Online dating the safe way

August 28, 2024

By Kim Komando

You may not be looking for love online, but Tinder says about 40% of couples meet via apps. I know a couple who met on a dating app for farmers. They’re perfect for each other — they got married and have two boys and two girls under age 8 with another on the way. But for others, dating apps can be a complete nightmare.

The dirty details

A few months ago, I was trying to convince a friend to dump her loser boyfriend. We whipped up a dating profile for her. The next day, she had to delete it. Why? Her messages were filled with nothing but … 🍆.

There are so many stories of men and women dealing with creeps, stalkers, perverts and lowlifes. A recent Pew Research survey agrees:

• 38% of online daters surveyed received at least one unwanted sexually explicit message.
• 30% continued to receive contact from someone after they told them they weren’t interested.
• 24% were called an offensive name.
• 6% of respondents received threats of physical harm.

Don’t forget about scammers; some 52% of online daters believe they’ve encountered at least one scam. That’s 63% of men under 50 and 44% of women of any age.

A safe search for love

Looking for love online comes with a warning, but you don’t have to throw in the towel. Practice these tips to find your new sweetie safely:

Look for a verified profile badge. Tinder, Bumble, Hinge and OkCupid have them. If they’re verified, odds are, they’re not using fake photos.

Keep an eye out for photos that look overly edited. Try a reverse image search to see if the photo pops up somewhere else.

Only talk to new matches through the app. If they want to immediately take things to text or another app, that’s a red flag.

Video chat with a match before you meet them in person. Steer clear of people who want to meet up ASAP or don’t want to meet at all. I don’t want you to become the victim of a romance scam.

Always meet dates in public. It’s also a great idea to let friends or family know where you are. Take your own transportation so you can bolt if you feel uncomfortable or unsafe.

🐦Tweet-hearts: Two birds in love

I interviewed dating expert Amy Chan on my “Kim Komando Today” podcast. I asked her for tips on building a great profile and her formula for dating app pics. Here are her suggestions:

• Include at least one smiling waist-up shot and one full-body shot.
• Each photo should show a different aspect of your personality and interests — think one in the garden, one at a baseball game and one with your pet.
• Any and every pic should be recent enough to confirm the “you” they meet in person looks like the “you” in your pics.

💋 If you know someone trying to find love, pass this along — not to scare them, but so they can know what to watch for! One more thing: Be careful of anyone who says they live in a “gated” community; it could be a prison.

Don’t get left tech-behind – Stay tech-ahead

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