No one likes a thief, especially one who takes your stuff right off your front porch. And this time of year, they’re everywhere.
But here’s a fun one: What do you get when you pit those porch pirates against a former NASA engineer with a lot time on his hands? Sweet, sweet revenge.
It took months, but this man’s solution to fight back against package theft should strike fear into the hearts of any would-be thieves. And the video of his successes is quite the sight to see.
A magnificently stinky creation
When a package was stolen from the porch of YouTuber Mark Rober, he did what any of us would and went to police for help. But even with video of the thief taken by his smart doorbell, they wouldn’t help.
Being a sensible man, Rober didn’t go full-on vigilante to fight criminals under the cover of darkness. We can’t all be Batman. Instead, he was patient and came up with the next best thing.
Bonus: For less gratifying results, check out these 6 tricks to keep your packages from being stolen by porch thieves.
It took six months, but Rober engineered an ingenious contraption made to look like an Apple HomePod. But instead of a smart speaker, under the hood is a motorized container filled with glitter and four smartphones placed around the perimeter. Throw in fart spray for good measure, and you’ve got yourself a ridiculously fitting response for someone who thinks it’s OK to take your things.
Revenge is a dish best served with glitter
As you’ll see in the video below, it works like this. When a porch pirate grabs their new “HomePod” from the porch, a built-in accelerometer is activated that sends a GPS signal to Rober, alerting him it’s on the move. Once the box is opened, the cameras on those four phones begin recording video. That’s when the fun starts.
Before the crook can even muster a look of confusion, glitter is sent flying in every direction. While that unfortunate mess is still being surveyed, phase two begins. Fart spray is dispersed at an interval of every 30 seconds as a not-so-subtle way to suggest they discard the box.
Once they get rid of it, Rober can locate it using GPS, hopefully reclaim it and get it ready for the next contestant of “You Picked the Wrong Porch.” But even if the phones are lost, the video is uploaded to the cloud. Take a look at some of the glorious reactions below.
For best results, open the package while still in your car. That really seems to maximize the glitter bomb’s potential.
And did you notice the return address? It’s a brilliant nod to one of the modern holiday classics, “Home Alone.” So to porch pirates everywhere, “Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals.”
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