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Picaninny
Intermediate Member
1186 Posts |
 Posted - 12/31/2009 : 23:25:54
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| Mine too |
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Snowball
Senior Member
2686 Posts |
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Snowball
Senior Member
2686 Posts |
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pharmacymom
Advanced Member
6303 Posts |
Posted - 01/06/2010 : 20:51:24
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Thanks Snowball. I needed the chuckle after a trying day (see anything you want to talk about topic for my health care rant).
Pharmacymom |
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n3ynd
Intermediate Member
597 Posts |
Posted - 01/07/2010 : 17:37:47
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quote:
Originally posted by Snowball
No offense to anyone, but this is just too funny!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFTS18uUpgo
That's a good one! LOL
My wife works at a middle school and it really hit home with her.
Bob |
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gwing1
Junior Member
423 Posts |
Posted - 01/08/2010 : 18:44:23
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Thanks Snowball!! My mother was a teacher and my cousin IS a teacher, I am going to make sure she sees this, I know she'll like it!
gwing |
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CindyLou
Intermediate Member
867 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2010 : 12:38:00
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First Football Game
A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game
. Afterward he asked her how she like the game.
'I liked it, but I couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents,' she said.
'What do you mean?' he asked.
'Well, everyone kept yelling, 'Get the quarter back! |
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xhi
Advanced Member
14282 Posts |
Posted - 01/11/2010 : 17:52:53
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| That one just took me back to good old 1953 and the first look by an unsophisticated young'n seeing his first sports game. And did you know? What it Was Was Football! Enjoy! |
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CindyLou
Intermediate Member
867 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2010 : 11:08:56
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| Good one! LOL |
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Seadog
Intermediate Member
1078 Posts |
Posted - 01/13/2010 : 19:30:22
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From Maxine, The cartoon character.
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me.....
Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.
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infohound
Senior Member
3912 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2010 : 19:50:52
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A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. 'Have you ever done anything of particular merit?' St. Peter asked.
'Well, I can think of one thing,' the cowboy offered.
'On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota , I came upon a gang of bikers, who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So, I approached the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face ... Kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground. I yelled, 'Now, back off or I'll kick the s--- out of all of you!'
St. Peter was impressed, 'When did this happen?'
'Couple of minutes ago.' |
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dadmc1
Senior Member
2512 Posts |
Posted - 01/14/2010 : 22:27:19
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Seadog
Intermediate Member
1078 Posts |
Posted - 01/15/2010 : 11:49:31
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Here's another Cowboy joke.
An old prospector shuffled into town leading an old tired mule. The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town to quench his parched throat.
He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young Gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, ''Hey old man, have you ever danced?'
The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, 'No, I never danced, and I've never wanted too.'
A crowd had gathered quickly and the gunslinger grinned and said, 'Well, you old fool, you're gonna' dance now,' and started shooting at the old man's feet. The old prospector in order not to get a toe blown off or his boots perforated, was soon hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet and everybody was laughing fit to be tied.
When the last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double barreled
shot-gun, and cocked both hammers back. The loud, audible double clicks carried clearly through the desert air. The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds, too, and he turned around very slowly. The quiet was almost deafening.
The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels. He found it hard to swallow. The barrel of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's hands.
The old man said, 'Son, did you ever kiss a mule's a**?' The young bully swallowed hard and said, 'No sir, but I've always wanted to.'
There are two lessons for us all here:
1. Don't waste ammunition.
2. Don't mess with old people
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H48
Senior Member
3841 Posts |
Posted - 01/15/2010 : 18:53:24
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From email today:
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
WOMEN'S REVENGE
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items
the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control
for a television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'
H48
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MrKite
Senior Member
2476 Posts |
Posted - 01/16/2010 : 06:13:41
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KIM'S CLUB ![The Kim Komando Show [Logo]](http://static.komando.com/websites/www.komando.com/www/kk_header_footer/v9/img/komando-header-logo.png){kind=logo}
Jokes of the day